Monday, March 31, 2014

On self-love and the hole in it


A little while ago I was confronted with a huge gap in my self-love. I had set the intention to work on loving myself more. I knew I wasn’t completely healthy in that area, but now I am looking into it, the hole in my self-love seems quite big and painful. (Wow! What a big hole! Echoe!)

Oh… Be careful what you wish for.. The universe conspires to make it happen.

I was sent a message by a friend about a mistake I have made months ago. About how it still hurts and makes her angry. I don’t want to go into what it was, as it is personal and not to be shared openly. To be very honest, I am still a bit ashamed about it as well.
Back to the hole in my self-love: where this all started. I fill up this hole with recognition from others. I need them to tell me that I am okay, or even better than okay. That I am welcome on this planet and loved.
I want to stop needing this, filling myself with outside-energy, while I should be nourishing myself and loving myself.

Her message reminded me that I have not forgiven myself for my mistakes. I know theoretically that nobody is perfect, that we are perfect with our imperfections and that we all have lessons to learn, but the pain I felt reading that message makes it clear that I have not embraced my shadow-side.

I suppose self-love is something many of us struggle with. I feel thankful to be handed another opportunity to grow in this.
So how do you handle loving yourself more? Giving love to others can be so easy… How do you love yourself and be kind to yourself?
Please let me know in the comments below..

I found this video a little while ago.. It makes me feel extremely calm and lifts up the heavy things in my heart. Life. It's just this. Calmness. Whatever you make of it. It was made by Marleen Renders.

No comments: